Erin Go Bragh

People ask, "What are you going to do on your trip to Ireland?"

My initial answer is to tell them, "We'll be touring around the south for a few days. Driving through the charming towns of Cork, Galway, Kerry and stuff."
Then, I say rather smartly, "After that we head up to Dublin to stay for a couple nights, where we have tickets to see some Irish rock band, you may have heard of them, called... Yoo-Two?"


But invariably, the conversation comes around to what are we actually going to tour and see? You know, what kinds significantly important things are we going to see that the Irish built or invented? This is where i begin to get a little defensive about my heritage.

For example, if you travel to England you are going to see Buckingham Palace and the Lord only knows that place is important. Egypt has the great pyramids. France the Eiffel Tower, and let me be sure I say this right, "Le Musée du Louvre". Italy has the Roman Coliseum. What does Ireland have. The Blarney Stone is the first thing that comes to mind. Damn.

You se, when you have to go to work in a business every day with two Germans who have a higher IQ than you do; a guy begins to learn what battles he can fight. And winning the argument over which country is greater, Ireland or Germany, always comes down to: who has built more factories, owns more tanks and ultimately, who has patented more inventions?

But, I'm not going to get into that. Whose country has done better things in the world or which inventions are more important. That would be immature.



Sure I can try to blog for you a few historically important Irish inventions as we travel across its beautiful Emerald Isle. But, if I happen to write about the people we meet and the good times we have instead of documenting the museums and inventions, who cares, right? Everybody knows the Irish have invented things. Lots of important stuff. They have.

For example, I'll tell you this only because we are on the subject. An Irishman invented the Harpoon Gun. Story goes that Thomas Nesbitt invented the harpoon gun in 1760 to pulverise some pesky whales who were making a nuisance of themselves around the Donegal coastline at the time. It used to really piss off old Tom the way they'd swim right next to his boat and spray water all over the gaff. "I'll sort you out ya bastards," he said. And so he did.

So for me, i can now relieve myself of the duty of any time spent defending or being obsessed on my family vacation over: What have the Irish ever invented?? It's about who has the most FUN. And if that means playing links courses, clapping with the crowd for more live music or socializing at a pub with the locals over a few extra pints at the expense of missing out on some museum tour, then bring it on!

Sláinte!